The Fotno Roast

[BassCatter]

Fotno once got in a staring contest with the sun, and won.

Fotno lives in a log cabin he built with his own two hands.

Fotno had his tonsils taken out with a chainsaw.

Fotno lost his legs in a car crash and still walked it off.

Bigfoot takes pictures of Fotno.

[Hawkeye]

Fotno shaves his head 'cause he's not fond of the color "Brindle"

[BassCatter]

Fotno took a whole bottle of sleeping pills and he blinked once.

[Hawkeye]

fotno enjoys waterboarding and believes the foreign fighters should simply view as recreation time and enjoy it.

[BassCatter]

Fotno can strike a match on a bar of soap.

[threekidspa]

Fotno used to have to walk 20 miles to school every day in the blowing snow with nothing but a hot potato to keep him warm which he also had to eat for lunch...

[Fotno]

Damn Skippy.LOL

[Guru]

Fotno_ never wears shoes. He can leave toenail claw marks in Pine Bark and the soles of his feet are so thick I once saw him sling sparks walking down a black top road.

[Hawkeye]

NASA uses his head to bounce radio transmissions to other com Sats and to help recharge their solar batteries. Problem is, when he puts on his cap, all hell breaks loose and the astronauts have to resort to ship flag signals.

[threekidspa]

The USAF used his head as the basis to design a new device to defeat laser targeting designators....

[Guru]

heh, y'all got me rolling this morning.

[bpitt]

Y'all seen the 'Messing with Sasquatch' commercials? Well, the Sasquatch have tv in their caves, and they air commercials called 'Messing with Fotno', and he kicks their ass everytime.

[bpitt]

Fotno doesn't drink all that coffee to stay awake, he does it to keep Juan and his burro employed.

[bpitt]

That's not camoflauge you see Fotno wearing, that's his natural skin tone, he's actually naked.

[EricStratton]

fotno has a toenail on his pecker.

[bpitt]

When Fotno takes a leak, it's kerosene that comes out.

[BassCatter]

Fotno once drank a gallon of milk in one chug and didn't throw up.

[bpitt]

Fotno doesn't need a foghorn, he just belches.

[bpitt]

Dang RG, that's serious there.

[bpitt]

Pistol Ridge tried to elect Fotno as mayor, but he's too bad ass for that, so he's their grim reaper now.

[BassCatter]

One day when I was camping in yellowstone a grizzly looking rough character came up riding a grizzly bear, whippin it's butt with a live rattlesnake. He jumped off the bear and punched it in the head...the bear buckled. He grabbed my coffee pot out of the fire and chugged it and wiped his face with the coals.....in fear for my life I said "you wanna stay for dinner?" He said no he had to get the hell outta there, Fotno was after him.

[bpitt]

The NAACP has nightmares of marching through Pistol Ridge, home of Fotno.

[bpitt]

Osama bin Laden isn't hiding from the U.S. He's hiding from Fotno.

[bpitt]

The mystery of Jimmy Hoffa's disappearance begins and ends with Fotno.

[bpitt]

Elvis really isn't dead, that was one of Fotno's alias.

[bpitt]

Chuck Norris calls Fotno for advice.

[BassCatter]

Everybody loves Raymond???? Fotno don't!

[EricStratton]

fotno knows if you've been naughty or nice......really....he's watching you right now.....no, really......he's looking through your window.....I don't know how he got your address, but he knows where you live and he's watching you.....

[bpitt]

Fotno just may be watching you right now, and you don't even know it.

[BassCatter]

Through a scope

[bpitt]

The tried to give Fotno paddling's back in school, but they couldn't find a paddle that wouldn't break.

[bpitt]

See that red dot on your forehead?

[bpitt]

Skunks pass out at the smell of Fotno's breath.

[bpitt]

And Tupac's murder is a mystery?

[BassCatter]

Fotno wipes his butt with Coarse Sandpaper and shaves with a weedeater.

[carsalesguy]

he shaves with an electric hedge trimmer

[pooker]

Fotno_ eats roast haha

[Fish-Bait]

dang...

[BassCatter]

Don't Dang us!!!! You'll be in the sights before too long! < LOL >

[Guru]

The President put on some red socks one morning and Fotno_ called him up and asked him if he was really going to wear that.
Also scolded the secret service for allowing this to happen.

[bpitt]

That guy Fishbait got a picture of with his gamecam, well, let's just say, it won't happen again, thinks to Fotno.

[bpitt]

Some teenin boppers were driving out around some old ship docks, this looming figure stood before them and said, "I know what you did last summer, and I even know what you're going to do next summer."

It was Fotno......

[bpitt]

A bear crapped in the woods and went to use a rabbit to wipe with, but Fotno killed the bear before he could, then ate the bear, then sh*t, and then he himself used the rabbit to wipe with.

[pooker]

Fotno thinks Kramer didn't go far enough!

[Hobs]

Fotno_ is...






/thead