optimistik1
October 8th, 2008, 05:33 PM
Dear Wife: I'm writing you this
letter to tell you that I'm leaving you forever. I've been a good man
to you for seven years and I have nothing to show
for it. These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to
tell me that you quit your job today and that was the last straw.
Last week, you came home and didn't even notice that I had a new
haircut, had cooked your favorite meal and even wore a
brand new pair of silk boxers. You ate in two minutes, and went
straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don't tell me
you love me anymore; you don't want sex or anything that connects us
as husband and wife. Either you're cheating on me or you don't love
me anymore; whatever the case, I'm gone. Your EX-Husband P.S. Don't
try to find me. Your SISTER and I are moving away to West Virginia
together! Have a great life!
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Dear Ex-Husband
- Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter.
It's true that you and I have been married for seven years, although a
good man is a far cry from what you've been. watch my soaps so much
because they drown out your
constant whining and griping. Too bad that doesn't work. I did
notice when you got a hair cut last week, but the first thing that
came to mind was 'You look just like a girl!' Since my mother raised
me not to say anything if you can't say something nice, I
didn'tcomment. And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have
gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork seven
years ago. About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you
because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, and I prayed that it
was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed fifty dollars from
me that morning. After all of this, I still loved you and felt that
we could work it out. So when I hit the lotto for ten million dollars,
I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica. But when I got
home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason,
I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My
lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won't get a dime
from me. So take care. Signed, Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell and Free!
P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this but my sister Carla was born
Carl. I hope that's not a problem.
letter to tell you that I'm leaving you forever. I've been a good man
to you for seven years and I have nothing to show
for it. These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to
tell me that you quit your job today and that was the last straw.
Last week, you came home and didn't even notice that I had a new
haircut, had cooked your favorite meal and even wore a
brand new pair of silk boxers. You ate in two minutes, and went
straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don't tell me
you love me anymore; you don't want sex or anything that connects us
as husband and wife. Either you're cheating on me or you don't love
me anymore; whatever the case, I'm gone. Your EX-Husband P.S. Don't
try to find me. Your SISTER and I are moving away to West Virginia
together! Have a great life!
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
Dear Ex-Husband
- Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter.
It's true that you and I have been married for seven years, although a
good man is a far cry from what you've been. watch my soaps so much
because they drown out your
constant whining and griping. Too bad that doesn't work. I did
notice when you got a hair cut last week, but the first thing that
came to mind was 'You look just like a girl!' Since my mother raised
me not to say anything if you can't say something nice, I
didn'tcomment. And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have
gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork seven
years ago. About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you
because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, and I prayed that it
was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed fifty dollars from
me that morning. After all of this, I still loved you and felt that
we could work it out. So when I hit the lotto for ten million dollars,
I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica. But when I got
home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason,
I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My
lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won't get a dime
from me. So take care. Signed, Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell and Free!
P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this but my sister Carla was born
Carl. I hope that's not a problem.